I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
