Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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