if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
