I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
