Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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