Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
