IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize