pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
They took my balls.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
