sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
