I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
