butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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