Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
