whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
