I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
