My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
accomplished twins. life is a go
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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