she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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