Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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