There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
