Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
