o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
