Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
tequila makes me forget i have legs
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
