You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
