for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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