ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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