does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
