Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
