What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
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