They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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