well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
you had me at cake vodka
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
