its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
