maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
