Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
