Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize