On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
