oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
