Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
