But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
