Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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