I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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