he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
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