We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
