strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
