Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Your cock deserves a montage
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
