actually, I'm a sock model
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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