just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Randomize
