Whod you bang
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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