Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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