Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
