Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
