That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
